"What If..."

I mentioned some of the many "what ifs" that we have in an earlier post. I won't list them all again, but I'm going to write about one specifically that I've been asked many times recently.

"What if you're chosen by a birth mother and then she changes her mind at the hospital after she sees the baby?"

Well, I'll fall apart. Obviously. The goal in this entire journey is to bring a baby home, so if the birth mother decides to keep the baby, I'll be a complete mess.

Here's the thing. This IS a possibility. When we are matched with someone who is pregnant, they can't sign over their rights right then. In fact, they can't sign over their rights until 48 hours after the baby is born. Yes, that is going to be the LONGEST 48 hours of my life. This happens. I asked our home study writer when she was in our home a couple of weeks ago how often this happens. She said she worked about 15 adoptions in the last year, and 2 changed their minds at the hospital. So clearly, the majority of adoptions are successful, but there are some that don't happen.

This absolutely scares me. However, I can't dwell on this possibility.
Here's another fact that people don't like to talk about. Just like adoption is not guaranteed, pregnancy isn't either! No one asks expectant mothers, "What if your baby doesn't make it to term?" That's a terrible question to ask pregnant women! However, all pregnant women are aware that there is a certain degree of risk with every single pregnancy. They choose to focus on the good! They choose to believe their baby is going to be born at around 40 weeks and that the baby will be strong and healthy. They do not dwell on any possible negative outcomes until they have to. THAT is what we must do with this adoption. I cannot wonder each day if we'll be completely crushed at the end of this. I can't talk constantly about how we'll handle the grief of preparing for a baby and then never bringing him/her home. I refuse to do this! If this happens to us, it will be awful. The heartache will be immense, but we will deal with that if it comes.

Right now, I'm choosing joy and excitement! We are going on a crazy, big, overwhelming, beautiful journey that will result in a little baby one way or another! We have faith in God's sovereign plan!
The "what ifs" can be scary, but WHAT IF this whole thing turns out perfectly?!
WHAT IF we are matched with a precious woman who just wants what's best for her child?
WHAT IF we are what's best for that sweet little one?
WHAT IF we prepare a nursery and get ready to bring a baby home?
WHAT IF we drive to the hospital one day and meet the child God planned for us long ago?
WHAT IF the birth mother has peace with her adoption decision?
WHAT IF we fall head over heels with an innocent child?
WHAT IF 48 hours after the birth, the birth mother signs over her rights?
WHAT IF we load our car up with a car seat and a tiny little human and bring him or her home as ours?
WHAT IF this works?